Let me preface this with the whole “I really hate hate” bit. I know! I know!!! Still, I don’t like it. I”d much prefer to (attempt to) use my words. And, even though it may be a bit daft and childish of me, I prefer good ole’ John Lennon. Or, at least an open mind… 😛
Still, I do believe that extremes are valuable starting points. They show us where we care. No one ever made a fuss over anything that was okay.
So, things I hate. Or, more accurately, let me start you off with a story.
I was teaching one of my lovely adult students at the rink. Now, I am continually impressed by adults that put themselves in vulnerable positions. Because, quite frankly, there seems to be an inverse correlation between ‘adulthood’ and a willingness to be vulnerable. The trouble is– vulnerability is fertile.
Still, I get that it is hard. So very hard. The guise of ‘grown-up’ somehow means infallible nowadays. At least for some. And, you can’t be infallible and vulnerable. Ego Teflon. Lucky, I was never cool…
(Just ask my Russian tutor. Major Plo-hah! ;))
So, I was teaching a grown up student and I gave her a technical correction. I always try my best to be super-conscious to do this when teaching. Having been weaned on the: “Are you stupids?”, I know that character attacks are just that. Attacks. Not productive. Weakening and not good for the psyche. I much prefer progress and smiles.
(I got those too. Hare-ae-schoow!)
So, you can imagine my sadness and chagrin when my own student responded to a well-crafted technical critique with: “I know. I’m pathetic.”
NO. NO. NO!!!!
I had to yell back. (Maybe that wasn’t the best choice 😦 .) Where does this junk come from?! I asked her to repeat what I had said. She did. I asked her to repeat what she had said. She did. I asked how the two statements were AT ALL RELATED?!! She did not know.
And, then she cried…
NO. NO. NO!!!!
We have to stop this gals (and guys)! When did our own self-loathing translations become acceptable?
Here’s a hint: They are not.
Things I hate: Believing that you are less than. Believing your daft narrative. Believing that anyone can take your respect.
Don’t hate on you. Ever.