So, the other day we talked about PLANS. Here is another important reason to make / lose your own!
I was sad and struck when I read this article about parental ‘hyperconcern’ leaving kids fragile and en route towards self-implosion.
(Probably because it rings SO true.)
It is such a THOUGHT PROVOKING and DUH! article. Read it. I see it at my work all the time. I hear about. I’ve probably lived a bit of it too.
Too many of us are not weaned to show up for our lives:
“With few challenges all their own, kids are unable to forge their creative adaptations to the normal vicissitudes of life. That not only makes them risk-averse, it makes them psychologically fragile, riddled with anxiety. In the process they’re robbed of identity, meaning and a sense of accomplishment, to say nothing of a shot at real happiness. Forget, too, about perseverance, not simply a moral virtue but a necessary life skill. These turn out to be the spreading psychic fault lines of 21st-century youth. Whether we want to or not, we’re on our way to creating a nation of wimps.” (Source)
(Where’s that Wimpy Kid when you need him? 😉 )
And, the ability to schedule and manage our time, while we set goals for and by us, has diminished too. We do not do the hard work either. (And, maybe fail — taking the ride of life :P.) This has mental health implications. Read on:
“Herein lies another possible pathway to depression. The ability to plan resides in the prefrontal cortex (PFC), the executive branch of the brain. The PFC is a critical part of the self-regulation system, and it’s deeply implicated in depression, a disorder increasingly seen as caused or maintained by unregulated thought patterns—lack of intellectual rigor, if you will. Cognitive therapy owes its very effectiveness to the systematic application of critical thinking to emotional reactions. Further, it’s in the setting of goals and progress in working toward them, however mundane they are, that positive feelings are generated. From such everyday activity, resistance to depression is born.
So, writing, going to that yoga class, learning French / Russian / Klingon / Guitar / skating is healthy for the mind! And:
What’s more, cell phones—along with the instant availability of cash and almost any consumer good your heart desires—promote fragility by weakening self-regulation. ‘You get used to things happening right away,’ says [Bernardo J.] Carducci [a professor and researcher]. You not only want the pizza now, you generalize that expectation to other domains, like friendship and intimate relationships. You become frustrated and impatient easily. You become unwilling to work out problems. And so relationships fail—perhaps the single most powerful experience leading to depression.” (Source)
Bluntly — We don’t sit. Stay. Become us. Strong grown. AND, we are worse for it.
So what’s to do? Eat more
Wheaties kale? Stay in that situation? Play? Work?
(Ask mom and dad… 😉 )
What if we just try? (Intent and committed.) Again.
Then, it gets a little better. Stronger. By us.
We get a little healthier. Stretched strong.
I can do that.
We ALL can.